When you were mine

Your smile used to conceal

the pain you held inside.

I never saw the anguish

because I wasn't looking.

I wasn't looking to see

beyond that beautiful face.

Maybe because I didn't want to

or because what I saw was just enough.

One day turned to two,

then two days became three

and then it was all routine.

Seeing you was routine,

part of my life,

part of us.

I was your fix,

as you were mine.

Then the daily dose,

the simple drag

slowly turned into an addiction.

We exposed ourselves beyond limits.

We drunk and laughed about it, because tomorrow would come

and wipe the slate clean,

give us both a new start

As you would go back to your life

And I mine

We never judged each other,

God knows there was a lot to judge.

You were you

and I was me. Because it was supposed to be simple, brief.

I have questions in my head

I cannot answer now,

like how did things change?

How, after all the sides of each other we saw,

did we end up here?

I can see your pain now,

Even when you conceal it,

It stares me blankly in the face

Waiting for me to acknowlege it.

I can talk to you

when we're hours apart

and tell when something is wrong.

Were we fooling ourselves?

Thinking we could be

wild, carefree, simple and brief,

and still walk away untouched?

Did nature make a mistake,

drawing our fates,

so dangerously close to one another?

Was it nature's cruel attempt

to put us together as a failed idea of a joke?

Our flaws were our safety nets.

They were the reasons

we could never be together

The reasons why

we could never see more

than we were supposed to.

These flaws,

they taint us now.

They taint us

because we've seen the worst of each other

and we know what we're capable of.

They frighten us

because only they can hurt us,

keep us apart.

Some dark angel must be smiling now somewhere,

because this fling has turned lethal

It has become a poison

and its quickly consuming us.

Because a fix

is no longer enough anymore.

The addiction

has grown so much out of control.

I fear the outcome,

because we're here now.

I'm here,

you're there,

and am waiting for you.

If you never show up,

I will understand

And I will hope that

at least I was able to take away your pain

even if its just a little of it.

Mostly, I hope that

I made you half as happy

as you made me

when you were mine, and I yours