Turn The Switch

I used to be in love

with the idea of love

I'd fall in and out of love

everyday, all the time

I loved the feel

of my pounding heart,

The automatic smile

at the very thought,

The unusual tremble of my knees,

The curl of my toes in my shoes,

The dreamy thoughts

and futuristic fantasies,

It was always so magical,

falling in love and being in love,

I miss those days

because it was easy and innocent

Love was my loyal companion,

my best friend even.

What happened that love,

simple as it was,

could turn such a beautiful, powerful force

into something so ugly?

Or turn craving and desire

into pain and lies?

I loved how spontaneous

it could at times be.

Now the very thought

of everything it represents

repulses me.

I wish it had an off switch

so that I can get over you.

Trust me, If I could,

I'd rip my heart

right out of my chest

just so I can stop feeling this way.

I'm crippled by desperation

how could my very best friend

turn into my own worst enemy?

I gave the very best of me

and all I got in return

was an easy tear trigger.

Someone tell me,

where is the stupid off switch?